Listen to my rant.......

My job requires me to travel....if I am lucky enough the travelling seems to be around Penang. At times I would be required to go quite a distance for a meeting but this is the kind of job that I was looking for when I was still in school. Back to the topic.....during one of my routine driving around Bukit Mertajam just the other day, I was amused by a policeman standing right in the middle of the road.....simply just blocking traffic from either side....Being the impatient alpha male in today's society, I started to ask myself on WTF was going on....accident?? road work???

Check out the traffic behind me......and it was during rush hour.....people seems to be rushing for work, meetings or attending something important.....why stop the traffic??? tortoise crossing ar??? What's wrong?? JALANLA oiiiii JALANLAAAA

All of a sudden, several police bikes swooped by.....wahhhhh.....I love those bikes.....but WAIT......why are they on the other side of the traffic???.....directly against traffic......(all of a sudden the idea of stopping both side of the traffic makes sense).....

LASTLY, I saw a Merz with a flag....and no number plate trailing from behind..........if it was an ambulance then I won't be so 'tulan-ed' aka f**ked up..........I assumed it was just another mascot living at the expense of my income tax and demanding for a presidential treatment (as long as I am paying my tax, you'll gonna hear a lil bit from me...my rights...RIGHT?)....since when driving against the traffic is legalized by the JPJ at any point?? Let me know if I left out any new rule from the JPJ.....

If you're saving lives, or giving out millions to the poor, or even attending a meeting for the good of the people around and maybe even make my life a lil more better THEN........I don't mind.......

If you're attending a prayer and you make me wait in the middle of a traffic jam at high noon where the temperature hits 33 degrees.........THEN............

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RAT ALERT....DIE DIE DIEEEE

The washing machine was down last week. Had 2 technicians came over, got it fixed and to my suprise one of them told me...."There's a rat hiding inside the washer"...........and the only remark I could afford to make was......."WHAT!!!!!!!!!!!!!"





It costs me a freaking RM65 to get washer fixed. What would you do when trouble comes knocking at your door??? I am more a fighter rather than to sit back and let trouble goes by. On Friday November 23, 2007....I declared war with a RAT.....either me or the rat!!. Bought several traps for my quest to win the battle of survival.






Once I got everything figured out, I found myself lost on what to use as bait to catch this enemy of mine. Called Papa and he suggested salted fish (no salted fish at home - highly prone to cancer and I don't want the rat to die of that neither......it takes too long). I passed the idea of using rat poison as I don't want my enemy laying dead in my hall.....damn.....worst still on my imported sofa. After some thoughts I came out with an idea of the bait......so freaking lucky as I was exposed to cartoons during my early years.....



* CHEESEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE




* Luckily got some to spare..........




* Too tempting for the rat to walk right pass........how could you not take a bite.....

* My kitchen would be the Waterloo to this long-tailed rodents of the family Muridae or just plain.....RAT!!!!!!

and 4 days later.............................

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* GOTCHA!!!!!!!!!!!! Hahahaha.......Who's your daddy now!!!!! hahahahaha it was the exact feeling I had when I won the 100m sprint several years ago......

* You're as good as dead.........now die.....dieeeeeeeee

* dieeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

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"What would you do when trouble comes knocking at your door?"

Answer : Get a 5 dollar trap....catch trouble and throw it to the gigantic drain right in front of the house. + together with the cage............

6 Classic Affairs

The 1st Affair:
A married man was having an affair with his secretary. One day they went her place and made love all afternoon. Exhausted, they fell asleep and woke up at 8 PM. The man hurriedly dressed and told his lover to take his shoes outside and rub them in the grass and dirt. He put on his shoes and drove home. 'Where have you been?' his wife demanded. 'I can't lie to you,' he replied, 'I'm having an affair with my secretary. We had sex all afternoon.' 'You lying bastard! You've been playing golf!'


The 2nd Affair:
A middle-aged couple had two beautiful daughters but always talked about having a son. They decided to try one last time for the son they always wanted. The wife got pregnant and delivered a healthy baby boy. The joyful father rushed to the nursery to see his new son. He was horrified at the ugliest child he had ever seen. He told his wife, 'There's no way I can be the father of this baby. Look at the two beautiful daughters I fathered! Have you been fooling around behind my back?' The wife smiled sweetly and replied, '! Not this time!'


The 3rd Affair:
An undertaker was working late one night. He examined the body of Mr. Schwartz, about to be
cremated, and made a startling discovery. Schwartz had the largest private part he had ever seen! 'I'm sorry Mr. Schwartz,' the undertaker commented, 'I can't allow you to be cremated with such an impressive private part. It must! be saved for posterity.' So, he removed it, stuffed it into his briefcase, and took it home. 'I have to show you something you won't believe,' he said to his wife, opening his briefcase. 'My God!' the wife exclaimed, 'Schwartz is dead?!?!'


The 4th Affair:
A woman was in bed with her lover when she heard her husband opening the front door. 'Hurry,' she said, 'stand in the corner.' She rubbed baby oil all over him, then dusted him with talcum powder. 'Don't move until I tell you,' she said. 'Pretend you're a statue.' 'What's this?' the husband inquired as he entered the room. 'Oh it's a statue.' she replied. 'The Smith's bought one and I liked it so much I got one for us, too.' No more was said, not even when they went to bed. Around 2 AM the husband got up, went to the kitchen and returned with a sandwich and a beer. 'Here,' he said to the statue, 'have this'. 'I stood like that for two days at the Smith's and nobody offered me a damned thing.'


The 5th Affair:
A man walked into a cafe, went to the bar and ordered a beer. 'Certainly, Sir, that'll be a penny.' 'A penny?' the man thought. He glanced at the menu and asked, 'How much for a nice juicy steak and a bottle of wine?' 'Five pence,' the barman replied. 'Five pence?' exclaimed the man. 'Where's the guy who owns this place?' The bartender replied, 'Upstairs, with my wife.' The man asked, 'What's he doing upstairs with your wife?' The barman replied, 'The same thing I'm doing to his business down here.'


The 6th Affair:
Jake was dying. His wife sat at the bedside. He looked up and said weakly, 'I have something I must confess.' 'There's no need to,' his wife replied. 'No,' he insisted, 'I want to die in peace. I slept with your sister, your best friend, her best friend, and your mother!' 'I know, I know,' she replied. 'Now just rest and let the poison work.'

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* TGIF.......going home soon.....

I met a humble guy.......

Life seems to be a never ending learning process. Let me tell you guys what I encountered today......left me speechless and slightly abashed. It all started as I was conducting an interview on my second candidate.....nothing out of the ordinary....just the feeling I had about this guy. (I AM NOT A GAY and this is NOT A SEX POST) Have anyone of you ever came across a person so humble, you feel all of a sudden you need to do something to your own arrogant self?

He has nothing much to offer for the interview, just another regular candidate, regular looking but yet with a decent greeting in his smile. His appearance seems fine...just a lil conservative for his age with a tie and a shirt....and he came on a taxi. Yet to have the leisure to own a car for himself. Aiya hard to explain the whole scenario....just after interviewing him, all I could say is he has nothing much but yet he gave his very best for the interview. Its not everyday you could meet such humble-being......




* And yes....he looks a lil bit like the Lama dude........


After the life lesson from this guy, I made up my mind to be as humble as possible in the future. I will neither shout nor curse my clients.(Only applicable to those paying clients). Make less horrible remarks to whatever things that I come across......will not criticise my government for spending my tax money by sending a joker to the space.....etc etc....




* yea right.......


I will now indulge my life to learn on how to be as humble as can be. Less arrogant and try to be a saint......St. Bogus hahahaha.....so if you slap me on my left cheek...........I WILL STILL KILL YOU!!!!!!



* I could even write a book......Humble guide for dummies......

* With the world supporting me, I know I could do it..........

Friday Jokes - 18SX

A little something to cheer for the upcoming weekend.................


DON'T LOOK AT A NAKED LADY
Boy 1: Why do you run from a naked lady?
Boy 2: Because my mum said that if I look at a naked lady, I'll turn into stone. A part of me is getting hard already!


NAMES OF WIVES
A man had 4 wives, and he called his...
4th wife..... Baby doll
3rd wife.....China doll
2nd wife.... Barbie doll
1st wife..... Panadol !


RESEARCH FINDING
Research shows men are fatter than women because every night men get fresh milk & 2 big papayas while women only get 1 banana, 2 peanuts & 1 tea-spoon of starch!


ARAB MAN
An arab was being interviewed at a US checkpoint.
"Your name please?"
"Abdul Aziz"
"Sex?"
"Six times a week!!"
"No, no, I mean male or female!"
"Doesn't matter, sometimes even camel!"


HAPPY MAN
What makes a happy man?
Daughter on the cover of Cosmo.
Son on the cover of Sports Illustrated.
Mistress on the cover of Playboy and ..
Wife on the cover of "Missing Persons"


SWIMSUIT
Why was the 2-piece swimsuit invented?
To separate the HAIRY section from the DAIRY section.


DENTIST
Woman complaining to dentist: "It's so painful, I'll rather have a baby than have a tooth removed."
Dentist: "Make up your mind soon, I'll adjust the chair accordingly."


OLD MAN AND YOUNG GIRL
75 yr old man got married to a 15 yr old girl.
On their first night both were crying..........Why???
Because she didn't know anything and he had forgotten everything.

My Old Lifestyle That I Miss Terribly

It was more like a coincidental gathering when I was in KL 2 weeks ago. I told LimGaikGaik I had a meeting on Friday and she said everyone would be back on that day itself....then it was set. Maison - 11pm. As I was driving down, gave HaiNick a call and then my dinner was set too....7pm gathering with The Hais.....




* Everyone got off earlier to meet up before dinner......it has been a while since all of us hung out together in KL.




* KouHai taking the lead.....HAPPY HOUR BEFORE DINNER......to be frank I was extremely hungry at that time......haih.....tradition....can't avoid.




* Chilling out at a deserted bar somewhere in PJ Uptown.......emptinesssssss.........




* My first beer tower.....chehhh nothing special.....out of beer quicker than the time I took to shit.....




* HaiShue and KouHai tried to light up the environment by trying to date the same girl at the same time. HaiShue used the sms while KouHai called..........





* Nothing comes cheap....sms can go eat shit la.....

* Hail VICTOR........hahahaha.......Romeo of the day.......

* Makan time...shut up and eat..........ngam ngam.......

* HaiNick offered me a stay for the night....check out his place.....wahhhh his TV is so slim you can't even notice it through the side angle....damn.....I need to get one too......too bad.....NO MONEY.....

Next stop, Maison

* Long lost friends.....been a year since I met Jushin....Rob seems to be a regular while LimGaikGaik pops out once in a while.......

* HaiBoon and HaiNick joined in the fun.....the rest of the Hais lost their cocks that night......but they ended up drunk.......somewhere............

* Housemates reunited.....huhuhu how I long for a game of Mahjong instead meeting up here....I quit drinking remember?? ishhh.....
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More than a year ago.....................

* The 3 stooges from A3-9-8............


And now...............

* Just like old times............aiks.....Blackie is BALDING....yooo so fast botak liao.....

* LimGaikGaik posted this on her blog.......but let me explain....Rob drank too much that night...I was just helping to get him up.........see....nothing too fag about it.....

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BACK TO REALITY............

A Wonderful Weekend with Family.........

I am still in doubt on which post should come first. The one in Maison or the weekend I had with my family. Since LimGaikGaik posted the outing in Maison, then I might as well put up the one with my family instead.

Well, JieJie and JieFu will be going to Europe soon.......MengWai and MeiMei would be under the care of Papa and Mama this entire month. As for myself, I would be travelling home every single weekend until they return from their vacation. Wanna spend as much time as possible with my 'beloved duo'.

It has been a while since MW and I strolled the mall.......

(Warning!!! PICTURES AHEAD!!!!)



MW: NICE.......NICE.......
Bogus9394: Yea....nice......Let me get you a toy train......

* MW proudly walked away....a new toy train owner.......

MW: SEE.....SEE......

Bogus9394: Ohhhh ok.........

* MW gaining composure from his first ride.........

* Getting pro on his second.....................

* Acts like a pro on the final one...........

* Time to go home..........


While Papa and Mama were trying to put both babies to bed.......JieJie, JieFu, KitKit and I went for the quest to search for 'CHOW TOU FU' aka the stinking beancurd.....We drove all the way to Menglembu....at least 20-30km from home. FINALLY..................

* The two maniacs insanely in love with this stinking stinking delicacy.....

* Anyone tasted shit before? No? neither do I........I can't even stand the smell......even shit from Pinky doesn't come close to this....yucks.......beh tahan beh tahan........

* JieFu took us out for a drink near home.....to kill time....just enough for MW and MeiMei to fall asleep............

* After a couple of beers, KitKit started to show off his magic tricks to the owner of the place.....we ended up getting more beer on the house....damn.....I wanted to quit drinking...

* When they announced my name, JieJie was so embarassed....but JieFu kept his cool......

* I was glittering with hope....just like a superstar.....hahahaha HEY PAPA...I WANNA BE A SINGER.......DON'T WANNA WORK NO MORE.....hahahahahaha

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Who said you can't have a great day with your family?.........

Driving..................

Been doing a lot of driving lately. I do enjoy travelling once in a while but if on a regular basis, then it would be really backbreaking. Sometimes you'll have a good driving day and sometimes you'll not. Good driving day would be having great views and nice weather along the way while bad days would be getting a ticket for speeding or driving back from a meeting where your counterpart is a crossbreed of a female horse and a male donkey. A piece of advice to all....don't get too emotional in the things that you do.....it's business....some so-called veterans can't even get it right but I'm too smart for that.....I have an IQ of over 145 you know........my EQ? Incredibly high......am I boasting??? TEST ME.....hehehe




* Early driving is rewarding but BEWARE......calm water is usually infested with crocodiles.....SPEED TRAP ALERT!!!!!




* Funny name for a funny state.......it lights you up sometimes.......




* Worst of all......having a tortoise-liked driver right in front of you.....54km/hour....DAMN.....they don't call this the highway for no reason you d*ckhead.....



At the end of the day, it's getting back home safely that counts. Am I sounding as if I am writing a paid post? Well I am not....

* A Cowboy cleans his horse after a battle and make sure it is well enough for the next war.....btw boys and girls....the picture above is not a horse......and I am not even a cowboy....